Here is the secret to get what one wants. It is just giving. The reasons for it are based on the well-known philosophical dictum “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?” The egg, and the chicken that is born out of it, create the circle of life, and form the basis for a profound comparison for attaining and giving what one wants: the circle of joy. This brilliant concept is analyzed in the clear voice and lucid prose of Masami Sato, the author of the book named ONE.
As humans, many of us have longings for all kinds of things. And of course, theories of economics inform us that while requirements are unlimited, resources remain limited. This provokes us to think, the more the range of resources that we have, the more the longing that we will be able to fulfill. That is why we tend to defend our resources. We feel that dividing it between others or giving the resources away will reduce the amount we can retain to get what we ourselves want. This is the basic game of success and failure that is being acted out.
Is this true, then?
What if the answer turns out to be “no”? What if it in fact contradicts the secret of attaining more? What if the secret of attaining more is in itself simple – by giving more?
A person can get a thing by the simple act of giving. In the same way that he can get eggs by breeding chicks. In the most simple way. Naturally. Spontaneously. And it is a fully satisfying joyful sensation.
First of all, let us begin with some analogy to explain things.
Chicken and Egg: the Cosmic Circle of Life
Many a philosopher has come out with this question from the beginning of time, “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?”
The answer to this riddle is simple. It actually does not matter which came first, as both eggs and chicks are already here. Still, if we want to get better results, we can choose to start somewhere.
Giving and Receiving: the Circle of Joy
What if we asked a different question? “Which comes first, giving or receiving?”
Again, for better results, we have to begin somewhere. Giving away things to others is definitely far simpler than attempting to get it first!
What happens if we are trying to get it first?
If we want to have something, naturally we try to get it. And we try to hold on to it after getting it. This is very natural to do-it makes sense intellectually.
But the real results of ‘trying to get’ are often not abundance and real long-term rewards.
For example, hoping to see others happy is not at all about deriving joy from them, or manipulating them to become happy. It is about how much happiness we can give them and thereby share with them. Full stop.
So how do we start to get what we desire?
From the other end of the circle – by giving generously!
When we start giving before we even have what we hope to get – that which we dream of – we are sending out a powerful message to ourselves which tells us, ‘there is enough, and more will come.’ It allows us to sense the joy today – the joy of giving.
All that is required of us is to give out the love in abundance to others. It would somehow come back to us. Giving love is the only way to be completely loved. When we recognize others for the big things they do and great credentials they have, again it would come back to us. Others accept us because we accept them.
In the same manner, if we want to have plenty in our life materially, financially, and mentally, we have to share in full measure with others, what we want.
Some people may choose to give materially by giving their time. Others would choose to give financially by giving their wealth. Those who give much more (like time, wealth, kindness, affection, principles etc.) have more of all these because it is the balance. And balance is the law of nature.
Remind oneself of the rules of the game.
Rule one: never hope to get anything in return when a thing is given.
When we have the conviction that giving has got as its inherent part, ‘getting’ something back, we become upset when do not see the return immediately. We may even feel a slight dissatisfaction towards the receiver of our gift. And surely, nurturing a bad feeling for someone is not a proper thing to do! So we can experience the real happiness of giving when we are doing something with the knowledge that we are doing it only for ourselves – we are doing it for our own happiness!
Losing to win, giving to get..
In the beginning it may appear that we are the losers. Still, at some level we realize that receiving things without giving anything is not a realistic life pattern. We have always been aware of it. That is the reason why giving away a part of their income has been a pattern with many well known people. And they have not done it openly, so it was not done to make themselves popular. It was just the way they wanted it to be.
Just take a look around. ‘Simple’ forms of life on the earth do it routinely. The bumblebees fertilize the flowers in return for the honey they take from them and ensure that the flowers bloom profusely. Habitually. That is the rule. They do not do it consciously. That is why they maintain nature’s balance, without even trying.
Giving is just being who we are, it is just like having; not greater or lesser. No difficulty, no conditions attached, just releasing oneself.
The essence of getting more can be stated in two steps: Give first, and do not expect to get anything in return.
When we let go and give generously, what we want will be delivered to us. Naturally.
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